The Sunday Best

The incomprehensibly named Dress Pant Sweatpant from Betabrand (which seems to make clothes in the insufferable “clever” category:

At first glance, Betabrand’s latest creation looks like pair (sic) of fine charcoal wool slacks. Which they are, except for the wool part.

Now look closer; better yet, slip on a pair. They’re made from high-end French terry fabric, which has a subtle heather texture that’s similar to fine suit cloth. They look sophisticated, but they feel as slumped-on-the-couch comfy as your favorite pair of old sweats.   

First of all, they don’t look like a pair of fine charcoal wool slacks. They look like a pair of weirdly articulated, slouchy hiking trousers. Second, a pair of pants get their shape not only from the cut, but from the material out of which they are made. Jersey or terry fundamentally lacks the tensile strength necessary to maintain that shape; within a week these pant pants will have the same baggy look as anything college students wear for studying.

And I don’t understand this idea that good looking clothes somehow feel bad. Good clothes feel good. I have a pair of gray flannel pants that are easily some of the most comfortable things I own, and, should I want to, I can definitely splay myself across a bed and fall asleep with my shoes on, knee bent to demonstrate the give of fabric around my ass.

On a related note, I bought a pair of these Burgundy Joggers from Topman and, with my friends laughing the entire time, took to wearing them out, even though these are clearly labelled lounge wear. Is this hypocritical? No, because I’m not walking around in them, pretending I’m engaged in “sartorial subterfuge”.  In fact, if you describe your clothes as sartorial subterfuge you are doing it wrong.

1. There will be a rash of style blogs featuring photos of men wearing t-shirts and sweatpants. Or maybe only one. If only one, this person will get a book deal. The book will be sold in Urban Outfitters and called I Dress for Success. 

2. The blog Ryan Gosling Wore This will be created and also be turned into a book. Just to mess with us Gosling will take to wearing a lot of plaid and funny hats.

3. Men will wear pants cuffed so high sock garters will come back into fashion. Eventually the garters will attach to the moustache.

4. More pink.

5. The indoor scarf will meet its natural partner, the indoor animal fur undershirt.

Because it’s December, suddenly every single site has been inundated with gift guides. I don’t know, or at least I hope I don’t know, anyone who turns to a gift guide when making a decision about what gift to purchase whom. 

I’m sure that most sane people will be quick to point out that these guides are nothing more than a “Things We Like” post, justified by this season of not-really-but-kind-of-altruism. And I also understand that there may indeed be people who buy a loved one a car for Christmas.

Which brings me to The Sartorialist’s Unconventional Gift Guide, the first in what I assume will be many wacky and surprising gift suggestions by our favourite style-blog hater, Scott Schuman. Schuman’s first choice - a pair of Cordovan leather Bluchers by Alden. If you’re a fan of The Sartorialist, or really any other menswear blog, you’ll have seen these shoes before, making them less unconventional than, say, ubiquitous. So what about this choice warrants that adjective?

Maybe it’s the fact they cost roughly $680 a pair. 

I’m not trying to start some kind of A Continuous Lean-style argument about whether these shoes are WORTH that much. For the record, I think they are. I’m just trying to wrap my head around the idea that somewhere in this world, a pair of $700 shoes is considered a reasonable gift.

Now, I am not a rich man. Far from it. And I have no rich friends. So there’s the possibility that, in a social circle consisting only of millionaires, that $700 is a pretty average gift amount. (And the unconventional part is the, whoa nelly, I bought you shoes!) I suppose this could be the case.

But, you know…really? No - really?!?!

If this is true that’s fine, in a “let’s keep our ridiculous wealth to ourselves” kind of way. But not old Scott (I feel he’ll never read this, so I can call him Scott, the way he can call me Thomas. We’re good like that). Nope, old Scott just throws that right out there on his hugely popular blog for all the world to see. We all knew that Scotty was a dick, but given that Occupy Wall Street is happening essentially in his backyard, this seems a pretty big dick move even for him.

Clearly no one who reads The Sartorialist agrees with me, if you go by the comments. “Above Ground Pools” writes, “Great looking shoes. Love the picture, too.” And “pensive” adds, “Oh God yes, please encourage the cordovan. I’ve bought the Hubby an entire STABLE of cordovan in wingtips, etc over the years and while he complains at first that they look like old man shoes once the girls in his office start commenting they get worn all the time. Love the cordovan!”

A whole stable! Which is funny because, as you know, Cordovan is made from horses.

I guess the lesson we learned here is that Christmas is about talking about what we’re going to give to people, and seeming like we’re going to give them something really expensive. As Jesus said, “Go big or go home.”

The glasses at the top are my new pair from Warby Parker. I decided to go with the Monroe frame. The middle pair are the ones I’ve worn for about the last three years – Ray-Ban Wayfarer frames I bought off eBay with prescription lenses added later. And the bottom pair are Wayfarer II non-prescription sunglasses that I also bought off eBay. 

Warby Parker, in case you don’t know, is an online-only glasses company that follows the TOMS Shoes model. For every pair you buy from Warby Parker they’ll donate a pair to someone in need. If you live in the U.S. the glasses will run you $95 complete, shipping included. As a Canadian I had to pay $20 shipping, although with a 5.25 prescription I opted not to get the high-index lenses. The glasses look and feel fine to me.

So what’s the downside? Well, for $95 you’re getting a smart looking pair of glasses, but ones that are made in China and are not the sturdiest frames. I don’t have any fear that the glasses will break prematurely, but the plastic feels less solid than my other glasses. 

The Ray-Bans cost me around $30 off eBay, and the lenses cost another $110, bringing the total, after shipping, close to $150. For that I got a pair of made in America frames with lenses I chose myself, and paid about $25 more than with Warby Parker. The bottom pair only cost $21, and I might put lenses in those as well.

Would I buy from Warby Parker again?

Short answer - yes. Warby is a good company, challenging the pricing structure of the traditional eyeglass makers, most of whose frames are made by the exact same company. Had I bought the Ray-Bans new, the frames alone would have cost me around $135. When they finally get around to making prescription sunglasses, I’ll go to them. Of course, this might be tempered by how these Monroes put up with daily use. Update to follow.

In a recent article for Grantland, contributing writer Wesley Morris wonders about the absolutely bizarre phenomenon of baseball managers wearing player uniforms during games. (Even my wife, a person who has never sat through an entire baseball game, or even an inning, finds this “absolutely hilarious”.) He frames it around the former manager, and eventual owner, of the now Oakland Athletics, Connie Mack:

Mack managed the A’s when they were in Philadelphia, and he did so in fedoras, boaters, and three-piece suits. He wore tiepins, wing tips, and leather gloves. The Tall Tactician, they called him, and part of his tactic was to conduct the business of baseball while looking very much like a businessman. After Mack retired, in 1950, Major League Baseball created a rule outlawing non-uniform attire in the dugout. 

On Texas Rangers manager Ron Washington:

By the time the Series was over, you might have concluded that Washington was a man in need of a drink. Probably. But he was also a man in more serious need of a fedora.

Curious, I looked for images of Mr. Mack, and by god this was a man to lead a team to war. How insanely badass is it to command athletes while wearing a boater?

It’s time for a return of this practice for all sports. Leave the uniforms to the athletes - to the victor goes the bowlers.

Looking around Vancouver, with its fleece and GORE-TEX and endless glass condos, it’s hard to imagine it’s the same city that captivated Fred Herzog to shoot in colour. His photographs, slightly revolutionary at the time when people still believed all art photography should be black and white, seem to capture a bizarro Vancouver, one we’re unlikely ever to see again.

Particularly heartbreaking are his photos of a vibrant, beautiful Chinatown, long since replaced by the dingy pallor of people fighting to hang on.