7. The Hard to Shop For Man - A Guide

Why are men so hard to buy for? Cosmo has asked celebs and real men what box they want to open this Christmas.  So now you can purchase the perfect present for your boyfriend… - Cosmopolitan

Guys can be hard to buy gifts for, but shopping for the man in your life this holiday season shouldn’t have to be a nightmare. - Today MSNBC

Which begs the question—why is it always such a daunting challenge to shop for dear old dad? - Forbes

If your man is hard to shop for, I have some advice for you: he’s an asshole. If receiving a gift moves someone to mope, or get angry, or stare straight ahead in a tight-lipped stupor, that person isn’t “hard to shop for”. That person is an asshole.

imageWhen did this become an acceptable character trait? Being hard to shop for is a ridiculous thing to be proud of. It’s equivalent to bragging about being a picky eater, or quick to anger, or incontinent. 

Handmade sweaters, pairs of socks, books that reveal a lack of knowledge about our person…sure, I guess. People pay hundreds of dollars for handmade sweaters, but by all means laugh them off. And socks. If you want an iPhone, socks are a bit disappointing. For anyone else not delusional or insane, socks represent one less thing you need to buy, and everyone is always in a perpetual state of either needing or about to be needing to buy socks.

On any other day if someone gave you a pair of socks you’d be pleased, or at least bemused. Try that move on Christmas and lives are ruined. 

So, this Christmas, don’t be hard to shop for. Accept whatever is given to you with grace and humility. Be known as a person for whom buying a gift is a joyful experience. Not sure if you are? Answer this simple question - when some asks me what I want as a gift, I say _______. If your answer to that question is anything but “Whatever they want”, see preceding. Asshole.